Practices

Practices

Flogging

  Many people like to experiment with flogging, which is whipping with a multi-tailed whip called a flogger. Floggers are very scary-looking, but they feel nothing like they look, and often they're not painful at all.
However, you should avoid the cheap, stiff floggers sold at many sex toy stores and novelty stores; the lashes are thick and stiff, and the edges are not rounded, meaning they're painful and can cause injury. A good flogger has soft lashes and won't injure you. A very soft flogger, such as a deerskin flogger, does not hurt at all.

Paddling or Spanking


  If you are paddling or spanking someone, you should be careful where you hit. It's okay to paddle, flog, or spank someone's butt, thighs, or upper back; if you are careful, you can also spank or flog someone's breasts. Stay away from kidneys, lower back, and neck. NEVER strike someone in the face or on the neck with any object. Avoid joints, such as ankles, knees, and elbows--they're surprisingly fragile and easy to damage. Remember that a person who is bent over or in some other position that stretches the long muscles is more vulnerable, and can not take as much, as a person who is in a position where the body's long muscles are not extended.



Hot candle wax

  Hot candle wax is excellent for sensation play. However, all candles are not created equal! If you want to experiment with candle wax, it's best to use plain white paraffin candles, of the kind usually sold in grocery stores as "emergency candles." Scented and colored candles can contain plasticizers that make them burn much hotter. In particular, avoid all-black candles and beeswax candles; these typically burn very hot.


Bondage and restraint

 Many people like the idea of tying down their lover, but would rather do it with silk scarves than with ropes or chains, on the idea that silk scarves are more "gentle" and less threatening. Silk scarves, nylon stockings, and so on are actually quite dangerous for bondage, fir two reasons: they tend to pull very tight, making knots difficult to remove; and they tend to pinch, which can cause nerve damage. Good old-fashioned rope is actually far safer.




Spread-eagle restraint

  Spread-eagle restraint can become uncomfortable or painful very quickly. Positions in which the submissive's arms are tied out to the side or are tied to the submissive's waist can be maintained for much longer than positions in which the submissive's arms are over the head.




Handcuffs

 Handcuffs, the kind you find in sex toy stores are not safe for bondage, because they do not have a "double lock'' real police handcuffs can be double locked, which means that they can be set so that they won't tighten up if you press or sit on them. Cheap handcuffs without a double lock tend to get tighter and tighter if you press on them, sit on them, or struggle against them. You can find real police handcuffs just about anywhere.

Warnings!!!...

 • Do not leave a restrained person alone for any reason!
 • Do not place anything over the nose and mouth. If you gag your partner, make sure his or her nose is not covered.
 • Keep a pair of scissors handy, in case you need to get your partner loose in a hurry and don't have time to untie the ropes. Bandage scissors have a pointed upper blade but a blunt lower blade; you can slip them beneath a rope without poking or cutting your partner.




Breath Control

This is also called erotic asphyxiation, gasping, erotic strangulation, and so on. The idea is to choke or strangle someone during sex, to intensify an orgasm.

This is possibly one of the most dangerous of sexual practices. There is no safe way to do it. The greatest danger of gasping is not strangulation. Most people who die doing this die of a massive heart attack, usually 15 or 20 minutes after they're done. So if you think you can just let go of someone's throat and you're safe, you are mistaken.

I won't say "Don't do this," because the people who do this are going to do it anyway. I will say that if you're going to do it, make sure you know the risks!


Anal play

 Anal sex, if it is done right, is painless and intensely pleasurable. There are millions of nerve endings in and around your ass, and stimulating these can easily cause orgasm. It should not be painful even the first time you do it, if you do it right.

• Relax that's the first rule.

• Use plenty of lubrication.

• Never penetrate anyone vaginally with any object or body part that has been inserted anally. Doing this is just begging for a bacterial infection.

• Penetrate your partner slowly, especially if you aren't experienced with anal sex! Give your partner time to relax, especially if you're new at it.

• If you want to use anal toys, it's often wise to look for toys which are intended expressly for anal play



Humiliation play

 Humiliation play, sometimes also called erotic embarrassment, is a powerful but often misunderstood aspect of BDSM play.It's any kind of activity in which one person says or does something that causes feelings of embarrassment, shame, or humiliation in the other.

  This can be something as simple as dirty talk, for example by using terms like slut or whore to refer to your partner, or it can be as complex as creating situations that are embarrassing to your partner, like exposing him or her nude in front of others or walking him or her around on a leash.